Pink Dreams

I've been away in the country, secluded, surrounded by woods and sky. A time to go inside, figure things out.  Sometimes it's easier to do that far from home and everything familiar.  I've stayed in a castle.  These are venerable old buildings, filled with stories.  The trails meander through woods where owls live.  Acres and acres of land, places to explore.  Walking becomes a meditation.  Thoughts and feelings, long buried, come up and out--inspiration, to use another word.

I've encountered people seeking their own inspiration.  The woman who loves fishing boats, my next door neighbor who sings at night, his angel voice lulling me to sleep, the young artist who made me a bracelet and who has pink dreams, the teacher from the western hills.  We gathered twice, shared our favorite music.  Thank you to the pink dreams artist for making that happen.  So many more to thank, especially the people who run this magical castle.  They give us what they need, things we hadn't thought of ourselves.

I've spent this time offline, not posting notes, not checking facebook.  I've missed many people, but sometimes it's good to forget the outside world and travel inward, connect with my own heart, remember good things I've forgotten along the way.

Deep Blue Sea for Beginners: Out Now

This week the paperback edition of The Deep Blue Sea for Beginners is on sale.  I'm thinking of the title, of what "deep blue" means. The ocean, of course.  But there are other types of deep.  Deep love, deep understanding, deep non-understanding, the unfathomability of our own hearts.  The novel is particularly interested in fractured families.  A mother and her two daughters have spent years apart.  How do people become estranged?   What are the consequences of a single choice or series of choices?  How far can you move apart from someone, and once you've done that, can you come back?

These thoughts are on my mind now. I'm writing this from my own private deep blue location.   It's not sad, it's not bad, it's just a spot I came to reflect.  Miles from the sea, I'm in a rambling old place surrounded by New England woods.  There aren't many street or house lights, so when I look up at night I see constellations in the dark blue sky.   I'm surrounded by nature.  Thick trees, the leaves starting to turn.  A scarlet sugar maple stands  outside my window.

I loved writing The Deep Blue Sea for Beginners.   The characters feel real to me, all their hiding places and defenses, all their brokenness and goodness and desire to connect.  People can be apart so long it feels like forever.  But if you break through and find forgiveness, life can start over.  It's the same old life, of course, but there's an element of the brand new.   Love and forgiveness, or maybe it's forgiveness and love.  They go together.  I'm just not sure of the order.

It probably doesn't matter.